TXT: Little Johnny’s Grammar Lesson

One day, during a grammar lesson, the teacher decided to test the class with a simple exercise.

She stood in front of the board, smiled, and said, “Children, today I want someone to use the word ‘beautiful’ twice in the same sentence.”

Several hands went up immediately.

First, she called on little Suzie, who sat up proudly and said, “My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it.”

The teacher nodded with approval. “Very good, Suzie. That was a lovely sentence.”

Then she looked around the room and called on little Michael.

Michael cleared his throat and said, “My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully.”

“Excellent, Michael!” said the teacher. “Very creative.”

The class was quiet for a moment, and then the teacher noticed Little Johnny in the back row, waving his hand with far too much confidence.

She hesitated. Everyone knew Johnny’s answers had a habit of going in unexpected directions. Still, this was only a grammar exercise. How bad could it be?

“All right, Johnny,” she said carefully. “Can you use the word ‘beautiful’ twice in the same sentence?”

Johnny leaned back in his chair, thought for a second, and then began.

“Last night, at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was pregnant, and he said,

‘Beautiful, f*cking beautiful!’”

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