TXT: The Doctor’s Compliment

A lady came home from her doctor’s appointment looking happier than someone who had just won the lottery without even buying a ticket.

She walked through the front door with a huge smile, humming cheerfully and checking her reflection in every shiny surface she passed.

Her husband was sitting on the couch, watching television and eating chips.

He looked up and immediately became suspicious.

“Why are you so happy?” he asked.

She tossed her handbag onto a chair, stood proudly in the middle of the room and smiled even wider.

“The wife says, “The doctor told me that for a forty-five year old woman,

I have the breasts of a eighteen year old.””

Her husband slowly lowered the bowl of chips.

He looked at her, looked back at the television and then looked at her again.

For a moment, he considered simply saying, “That’s wonderful, dear.”

It would have been the intelligent choice.

Unfortunately, curiosity, jealousy and poor decision-making all arrived at the same time.

“Oh yeah?” quipped her husband,

“What did he say about your forty-five year old ass?”

The room suddenly became very quiet.

Even the television seemed to lower its volume.

The wife stared at him calmly, still smiling, while her husband began to realize that he had just walked into a trap, locked the door behind him and thrown away the key.

She slowly picked up her handbag and walked toward the kitchen.

Just before leaving the room, she turned around and delivered her answer with perfect timing.

She said, “Your name never came up in the conversation.”

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