*A sign in a shoe repair store*: “We will heel you, We will save your sole, we will even dye for you!”

At an *Eye Clinic* : “If you don’t see what you’re looking for, You’ve come to the right place.”;

On a *Plumber’s truck* : “We repair what your husband fixed”;

On an *Electrician’s truck* : “Let us remove your shorts”;

In a *Non-smoking Area* : “If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take appropriate action”;

At a *Car Dealership* : “The best way to get back on your feet – miss a car payment.”;

At the *Electric Company* : “We would be delighted if you send in your payment on time. However, if you don’t, YOU will be de-lighted.”;

In a *Restaurant window* : “Don’t stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.”;

In the front yard of a *Funeral Home* : “Drive carefully. We’ll wait.”;

Last but not least and I LOVE THIS……….

Sign on the back of *Septic Tank Truck* :

*”Caution – This Truck is full of Political Promises”*