The Navy realized it had too many officers, so it announced a special early-retirement program. The deal sounded simple: $1,000 for every inch measured in a straight…

My wife made me a doctor’s appointment because she insisted I’d been talking in my sleep every night. At the appointment, she asked, “So, Doctor… what’s wrong…

A soldier was running down the road, completely out of breath, when he spotted a nun walking nearby. He rushed over to her and pleaded, “Sister, please,…

A sailor brought his boat up to a restaurant dock one sunny afternoon, tied it off and started walking toward the entrance. He had been on the…

A little Johnny got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed he had his collar backward. The little Johnny asked why…

An Irishman is in the bar, drinking a pint of Guinness, A lady next To him says, “What a coincidence, I am having Guinness too. ”Irish man…

A man and his girlfriend are in the shower when the doorbell rings. The girl is just getting out and says, “I’ll get it. She goes to…

A large woman wearing a sleeveless summer dress walked into a busy London pub. She confidently raised one arm to get everyone’s attention and called out, “Which…

As the money changes hands, the preacher warns him, “Now this isn’t a regular horse. I’ve taught this one different commands… ” “To get him to run,…